For Love and Yoga

I often say the relationship we build with Self is the most important relationship we nurture through Yoga. Once we have established a connection to our inner self we can explore who we are without fear or obligation to change for the sake of someone else. We have the freedom to explore the meaning of our choices and the people we write into the script of our lives. I am also a firm believer that people come into and out of our lives for very specific reasons. Their presence, or lack of, is always to help us learn more about ourselves. Relationships are not about how to change, fix, or alter another person. That is the work of the Divine and although we all have divinity within, we can not be responsible for the growth or evolution of another. Our responsibility is to attend to our own needs first and foremost. We can't be in good relationship with others until we are right with self. I have found, as with most people, it is imperative to look at the relationship patterns we

I talk a lot about life balance and trying to live IN the world without succumbing TO the world. This is such a daunting task. Wouldn’t it be easier if I could just run away and live in a cave and meditate for twenty hours per day? I am not so sure that’s my path and I will tell you why. I don’t want to live in a cave. There are bugs in a cave. I can live without air conditioning but I refuse to be without heat and hot water. Seriously!  I like beer and nachos. I love watching my daughter create art and read to me in bed at night. I really enjoy having sex and I want to have a partner again when the time is right. I am not afraid to swear or smoke a cigarette with said adult beverage. I think animal farming is a travesty to nature and causes more damage and dis-ease than we realize. I think Black Americans have been living at the short end of the stick since the colonization of this country. Our European ancestors waged genocide against the indigenous people of this continent.  Th

“She needed a superhero so she became one”. How do we, as women, in this society become our own superhero? How do we break free from the imagined idea that we need someone, typically a man, to save us? From what or from whom do we need saving? Becoming a superhero to save others sounds very altruistic but I couldn’t begin to think of how to save others because I needed to be saved.  I tried getting my mom, my husband, my friends, my job to save me and that really wasn’t working out the way I had expected. When all those options failed I realized I needed to become my own superhero! AWESOME!!! What now? The first step in change is becoming aware. Awareness is a gift and when you are able to step back, look at the cycle of choice/consequence and measure that against what your ‘ideal’ life looks like, you will notice some disparities. I can’t identify my turning point because I believe it is now irrelevant. I do know I was miserable. I felt empty and deprived. I felt a deep yearnin

“She needed a superhero so she became one”.  How do we, as women, in this society become our own superhero? How do we break free from the imagined idea that we need someone, typically a man, to save us? From what or from whom do we need saving? Becoming a superhero to save others sounds very altruistic but I couldn’t begin to think of how to save others because I needed to be saved. I had already tried getting my mom, my husband, my friends, my job to save me and that really wasn’t working out the way I had expected. When all those options failed I realized I needed to become my own superhero! AWESOME!!! What now? The first step in change is becoming aware. Awareness is a gift and when you are able to step back, look at the cycle of choice/consequence and measure that against what your ‘ideal’ life looks like, you will notice some disparities.   I can’t identify my turning point because I believe it is now irrelevant. I do know I was miserable. I felt empty and deprived.

I have been in love and I have fallen out of love. I have had my heart broken and I am sure I have broken one or two hearts, although not intentionally. The deepest pain caused by fear and rejection leaves a lasting mark on our hearts. We suffer, sometimes in silence and sometimes screaming, but we suffer. Sometimes we make the choice to open our heart and share all of the love and passion with someone who is not ready, someone not in the same space, or perhaps someone unable to love with equal fervor. We take this as rejection and we suffer again. I believe this is a selfish love because we have an expectation of how we think that person should love. We are taking responsibility or their choices or limitations. We are trying to project our desire and our wants onto them, to control their behavior. I do not believe most of us come from a place of negative intention we are trying to level the field, to reduce our risk of injury. We employ many tricks to win over the focus of our

I have worked with people in pain for many years and the one common thread with chronic pain is we aren't aware of how debilitating it has been until we feel relief. I woke up this morning thinking about the power of the Pacific Ocean. I can feel the pull of the waves, taste the salt, and hear the gentle course and unambiguous crash of the waves. My very next thought was about letting go. I could let the waves wash over me and with their primordial rhythm take away everything that no longer serves me. The evolution of Self is a process. This process happens quickly at times like unrolling a cinnamon bun and other times it is a slow process like peeling layers of an onion. There are many occasions when we think we have just finished with a specific lesson and it cycles back to us in a deeper way to allow us to shed more of our ego and move closer to our authentic self. Pain is an agent of change. When pain is ignored long enough we develop coping mechanisms to LIVE with whatev