Self Study Proves Resisting Change Prolongs Suffering
I recently had a long conversation with my daughter's father and our "conversation" quickly deteriorated into our usual round of complaints about a lack of attention, communication, and disregard for the other person. My newer self recognized these patterns. My old self wanted to rail and scream and cry. We worked through what we had to do and we were able to find some common ground, even though we still disagreed on some points. I have put in a lot of work into how I handle my approach, my attitude, and my thinking when I disagree. I was being asked to test these new skills when they really matter. The rubber hit the road. After all was said, I felt sadness; sadness for our lost marriage, sadness for the man I once loved, and sadness for our daughter. I am not faultless. I have acted out of fear of rejection, anger and I repeated patterns I learned in my dysfunctional family of origin. But this conversation was different. I kept my focus on trying to build a relation